On Tattoos and Marriage

Marriage is the dream of most women, while tattoo is a no-no for a lot of us. But are you aware that getting a tattoo is very much like getting married? Here's why:  

Both would solicit public opinion If you don't want people taking a second glance at you when you pass by, you shouldn't get a tattoo. People will definitely look at you or at your tattoo, because it makes you different from the rest. It easily catches attention. Though some might look at it with indifference, some would admire, while others would raise their eyebrow. Nevertheless, people's reaction should never affect you. Same with marriage, people take notice when you start changing your surname in your legal documents, when you begin updating your dependents, when you apply for new IDs, and everyone greets you with 'congratulations' even if you prefer 'best wishes.' There are just a lot of people happy for you when you get married. There may be a few who would not be pleased, such as your ex, or maybe the bitter ex of your partner, or other people who simply don't understand the connection that you and your partner have.  

Both carry stereotypes Since both are subjected to public opinion, tattoo and marriage carry stereotypes. Sadly, tattoos, despite it's cultural and historical background as art and status symbol, it is now seen as something to be shun, carrying a negative connotation due to it's existence among prisoners that determines gangs. Getting a tattoo now is a no-no for a lot of people because of this. Some people judge so easily that they see delinquents on someone inked. What about marriage? Women carry a lot of stereotypes when married. They should master the household chores, they should contribute to the husband's responsibility of providing for the family, they should bear a child and should be hands-on moms, lastly, they should be better than other women to keep their husbands. I bet marriage sounds much more difficult than getting a tattoo on this aspect.

Both require preparation and maturity You can't just jump into a tattoo shop and get inked, nor can you run into a priest and get married. Both requires preparation which you need to work on for quite some time. There are things to consider before getting inked:

• Are you ready for a permanent mark on you?
• Are you willing to wait for a year before you can donate blood?
• Wouldn't there be any member of your family who will need blood transfusion?
• Are you willing to bear social stereotypes and embrace public attention?
• Are you sure your body features will no longer change ('cause it may alter the design in the process)?
• Will you 'always' love to see that design on you? A lot of things change: preferences, passion, romance, even partners. Make sure that your design claims lifetime.

What about marriage?

• Are you ready to lose the independence of deciding on your own?
• Are you ready to allot more of your time, resources and effort for your family against all that is bachelor?
• Are you willing to adjust on a lot of individual differences that you and your partner need to compromise?
• Are you ready for the sacrifices that follow child-rearing?
• Are you financially and emotionally ready to raise a family?
• Will your partner qualify for lifetime commitment?
• Do you see yourself committing to your partner till the end?

Both are permanent, so both need lifetime commitment One of the things that make tattoos and marriage a decision difficult to make is that they are permanent. Since there are a lot of things that inevitably change through the years, one should consider 'lifetime' as span of the decision. Fickle-minded people can't be inked nor married. If you find yourself shifting from one decision to another overtime, most likely, you will end up having your tattoo erased, which is, by the way, much more painful and much more expensive (than getting inked). Or you will end up divorced, which is much more painful (for your kids) and much more expensive (than the wedding). Commitment does not mean that you won't deal with times that you want your tattoo erased or you want to have your marriage annulled. Commitment is finding (which requires effort) to fall in love with your tattoo or your partner over and over again. Remember why you had one in the first place. Never get inked or married if you are not ready, because erasing a tattoo or nullifying a marriage leaves scars that time can't undo.